I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize