I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize
