Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
