I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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