I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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