im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
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