I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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