none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Randomize
