this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Randomize
