fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Randomize
