Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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