i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
