some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
The power of my boobs compel you
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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