why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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