She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
