I got her a Nickelback box set.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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