Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
