everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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