TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
