the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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