I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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