I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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