Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
