I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Randomize
