i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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