but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
