and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
