If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
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