i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
i out mim tonsoeep
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
