I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
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