I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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