I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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