He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
