Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize
