Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Is it penis luge time yet?
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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