As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Randomize
