i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
He felt like a one man threesome
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
