So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
