im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Randomize
