You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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