I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Randomize
