Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Randomize
