Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
Randomize
