I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Randomize
