Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
