He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
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