You're completely useless in the revolution.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
