Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
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