i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Randomize
