is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
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